wumpuses

you need to strengthen your problem solving/coping skills

Mon, 21 May 2012 11:15:18 -0400

Johnny Idaho: http://fab.com/sale/6232/product/138883/
Me: ooo
Me: i saw ones like these on etsy
Johnny Idaho: i apologize if i just obliterated any budgets you may have had
Me: not this time idaho! i have taken special precautions against your budget treachery
Me: for example, i just stabbed my left hand
Me: so that i cant use my mouse
Johnny Idaho: meh. not my problem. you need to strengthen your problem solving/coping skills.
Johnny Idaho: or construct better budgets for "trivial" expenses
Me: this blood on MY hands is on YOUR hands
Me: ahahaa pun
Me: uh oh
Me: bleeding out

Star Turtle needed to tow planet

Thu, 17 May 2012 09:30:54 -0400

Star Turtle needed to tow planet

Photo

Tue, 15 May 2012 23:44:21 -0400

IMs from my imaginary friend Tom

Tue, 08 May 2012 19:17:30 -0400

Tom: hey dude, what's up? how are u doin
Me: i'm fine
Tom: just wanted to say hello
Me: that's nice, what do you want
Tom: oh nothing, I promise. I don't need any slave labor, my ego massaged, or a free psychotherapist. i'm not even a real person, so I actually can't want anything. it's all simpatico, bro
Me: great, now what do you want

Photo

Tue, 08 May 2012 14:15:30 -0400

Not Your Kind of People Streaming!!!

Tue, 08 May 2012 13:46:13 -0400

Not Your Kind of People Streaming!!!

Tales from Trident Bookstore

Tue, 08 May 2012 11:41:39 -0400

She took a deep breath and exited the bathroom.

Gemma Lamar—an assumed name—returned to the gallery primped and proper, her fez hat in place and heavy pendant of unruly large plastic pearls wrapped around her abundant shoulders.

The gallery attracted a wealth of patrons. To the left wing was the “Squatting Lemur’s Prisms of Contemplative Glory,” an installation Gemma had devised by salvaging vats of fried oil from McDonald’s and twenty-eight pounds of cat hair from her favorite house pet, the obese Mister Wiggles. In the right wing, her falsely mustachioed partner, one Andrew Martinegro, was inviting honestly accoutred guests into “The Waiting Room,” a closet painted in an Ace Hardware rouge, and which featured a single wicker chair that Andrew had plundered from a thrift store outside his flat. Andrew stared knowingly at the latex void as his moneyed admirers murmured in approval when he sat in the unveiled work.

Together, the would-be art afictionados Lamar and Martinegro had made thirty-thousand pounds. A wizened curator, cusping one of Lamar’s bronzed size-DD brassieres, bowed gracefully with his purchase under arm, before exiting the gallery among the last of his company.

kylses: Taken with instagram

Mon, 07 May 2012 16:54:36 -0400

kylses:

Taken with instagram

types of people that I know

Mon, 07 May 2012 16:49:04 -0400

types of people that I know

no planet is safe

Mon, 07 May 2012 15:18:00 -0400

Me: so for this documentation, how detailed do u want it to be... because all i have is like 5 steps.
Brittany the Sith Master: that should be fine, it's not super complicated
Brittany the Sith Master: i hope this new agency is able to read and figure things out
Me: they might be illiterate slug toads from Neptune
Brittany the Sith Master: could happen, i bet they have very low rates on Neptune
Me: almost as bad as Pluto, after the astronomical downsizing
Brittany the Sith Master: that's the reality of layoffs, my friend
Brittany the Sith Master: no planet is safe

I LIVE

Mon, 07 May 2012 09:32:49 -0400

I LIVE

"For all their maverick swagger, the Avengers are dutiful corporate citizens, serving a conveniently..."

Mon, 07 May 2012 09:14:13 -0400

“For all their maverick swagger, the Avengers are dutiful corporate citizens, serving a conveniently vague set of principles.”

- A. O. Scott, New York Times Movie Review

chutney vs. marinara sauce

Wed, 02 May 2012 12:33:04 -0400

chutney vs. marinara sauce

i am not capable of being pleased

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 14:51:40 -0400

Me: Ministress! you grace the internet with your unspeakable presence
Ministress of Tasks (now departed): hello
Ministress of Tasks (now departed): how are you slave
Me: i am well, not quite suffering as much as I should be though
Me: which is to be expected in your absence
Me: this saddens me deeply
Ministress of Tasks (now departed): understandably
Ministress of Tasks (now departed): there are few who have my level of malevolence
Ministress of Tasks (now departed): are you keeping my memory alive?
Me: yes, every morning i paint my monitor with sheep's blood, then i don my black cowl and cape and make the rounds on the fourth floor
Me: preaching the gospel of the coming Unnameable Lord and Master
Me: usually i am pelted with tomatoes and plastic mice
Me: but i endure for your sake
Ministress of Tasks (now departed): you are doing well, and, while i am not capable of being pleased, you have at least not angered me with your actions
Me: that is more than I could hope for Ministress

Grayson Spawn Christmas List

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 10:31:54 -0400

Grayson Spawn Christmas List

playing games at Karen’s house (Battleship Galaxies)

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 14:40:00 -0400

playing games at Karen’s house (Battleship Galaxies)

playing games at Karen’s house (Goth Munchkins)

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 09:35:00 -0400

playing games at Karen’s house (Goth Munchkins)

portrait by Julie of me

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 18:16:09 -0400

portrait by Julie of me

courtesy of captain planet

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 18:13:12 -0400

courtesy of captain planet

New Michaud Bookend from IKEA $2.99

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 13:44:00 -0400

New Michaud Bookend from IKEA $2.99